In My Skin
by LoneWolf7
Summary: Ginny looks back on her first year. A huge battle is ahead of her, so she remembers one special person in her life...


Title: In My Skin.  
  
Author: LoneWolf.  
  
E-mail: howling_to_the_moon_alone@hotmail.com  
  
Rating: PG.  
  
Pairing: Tom/Ginny. Some implied *winks* Harry/Hermione.  
  
Feedback: 'Tis what I live for. Long reviews and additional comments are welcome, or just a little emotional note saying you loved it. Keep flames in your lighters, please.  
  
Summary: Ginny Weasley looks back on her first year. A huge battle is going to take place soon, and she feels that she is all alone in the world...  
  
Disclaimer: I do not owe Virginia Weasley, Tom Marvolo Riddle, Harry Potter, Ronald Weasley, Draco Malfoy, Hermione Granger, or some plot points you recognize from CoS and GoF. They are the property of Joanne Kathleen Rowling, Warner Bros Inc., Bloomsbury Press, Scholastic, and Raincoast Books. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended. The song 'Ordinary Day' belongs to Vanessa Carlton, who I do not claim to owe. I only owe the plot. Period.  
  
Notes from the Author: A big hug goes to Venom, for finding this song in my archives. A kiss and a gigantic snuggle for Kathryn, for she's the one who edits my crap stuff. I love you sweets, and there's a surprise at the bottom for you...   
  
-*-  
  
Just a day, just an ordinary day  
Just trying to get by  
Just a boy, just an ordinary boy  
But he was looking towards   
The sky.  
  
-*-  
  
Life can be so easy sometimes. You just walk through the days, not really counting which ones you like and which ones you don't. Then again, that always secures that nothing bad is going to happen to you. Or that's what you think.  
  
Something bad happened to me in my first year at Hogwarts School for Witchcraft and Wizardry. I was possessed by one of the most feared persons ever: Lord Voldemort. He made me strangle roosters. He made me Petrify students and a cat. He made me do stuff I didn't even know I could do.   
  
And all that through a diary. So you must understand that the only reason I am not writing this in a diary is because I hate the things. I never fully got over the pain he caused.  
  
-*-  
  
And as he asked if I would  
Come along  
I started to realize  
That everyday you find  
Just what he's looking for  
Like a shooting star he shines  
  
-*-  
  
It still hurts. To be alone in my bed at night, listening to noises outside. To be completely by myself, because nobody understands and nobody cares. He understood. He cared.  
  
But that's all in the past. He controlled my body and mind that year, and he confused me with all kinds of stories. I don't think of him as a liar, he just twisted the truth.  
  
That's how far I get at forgetting and hating him.  
  
-*-  
  
He said take my hand  
Live while you can  
Don't you see your dreams are  
Right in the palm of your hand  
  
-*-  
  
Mum's making me see some sort of counsellor to be completely sure that I didn't have a traumatic experience. I wish she had felt what I felt that year.   
  
I wish that even you could look at your hands in horror, because they were moving without you wanting it. I wish you could just feel the pain he made me feel when I didn't come to him immediately. I wish that you lost all ability to speak, because your mouth could not move out of free will.  
  
Traumatized. That is, I think, the best word to describe me with. Traumatized by everything that has happened. My brothers all have perfect lives. I bet that you do too.  
  
I don't.  
  
-*-  
  
And as he spoke, he spoke  
Ordinary words  
Although they did not   
Feel  
For I felt what I had not  
Felt before  
You'd swear those  
Words could heal  
  
-*-  
  
My life's far from perfect. I live in the shadow of my memories. First year, Horror year. That's the thing I say to myself as I go back to Hogwarts.   
  
I spend my whole life looking back on what has been. For I miss him. Even though he did terrible things to me. He is the only one who can understand.  
  
Understand that I am not perfect, that I am not your little innocent girl. Nobody else does. Although people have tried to understand me.  
  
-*-  
  
And I as looked up  
Into those eyes  
His vision borrows mine  
And to know he's no  
Stranger  
For I feel I've held him for  
All of time  
  
-*-  
  
Harry Potter tried to understand me. For he has a traumatized life as well. Both parents killed by my possessor. I don't blame him, really.  
  
I don't blame Tom Marvolo Riddle for killing them. In fact I know what he feels. I feel the same way. Harry's parents were supposed to be killed. As Harry was supposed to die.  
  
But Harry didn't. He was allowed to live on, and Tom was reduced to the ghost of his previous self. Then, in my third year, he came back. My Tom came back.  
  
-*-  
  
And he said take my hand  
Live while you can  
And if we walk now we will  
Divide and conquer this land  
Don't you see your dreams are  
Right in the palm of your hand  
  
-*-  
  
I fear for my future. I really do. Because Tom will start looking for me. He promised he would. But somewhere deep inside I want him to find me.   
  
'Soon, Virginia, we shall be together again.'  
  
He said that when he left me. When Harry slammed the Basilisk fang in his diary I heard him whisper that in my mind. Before he abandoned me.   
  
I have waited for so long. And now he has returned. Harry does not know what he's getting into. A fifteen year old boy, barely out of childhood, trying to defeat the most powerful wizard ever.  
  
-*-  
  
Please come with me  
See what I see  
Touch the stars for time will   
Not flee  
Time will not flee  
Can you be  
  
-*-  
  
I am laughing now. What a joke! Harry Potter against Tom Riddle. And everybody believes that he will stand a chance. Almost everybody.  
  
For I don't believe it. And neither does Draco Malfoy. I know that he thinks that Harry will be killed. I think that Tom will want to have more fun with Harry. He must crave the joy of torturing the one person he hates the most. I think that that is the thing he'll do first.  
  
Maybe he will capture everybody else too, and kill them in front of Harry. That would be fun. Even though my family will be present at that event. As victims.  
  
-*-  
  
Just a dream, just an ordinary  
Dream  
As I wake in bed  
And the boy, that boy, that   
Ordinary boy  
Or was it all in my head?  
  
-*-  
  
Do you really think that I care about my family any longer? I don't. As long as I can be with Tom again. I need him as much as he needs me. He needs me for strength of life. I need him to love me.  
  
Again.   
  
Tomorrow is the day it will all happen. Draco told me so. Tomorrow this all shall be true. And I will be with him when Harry dies. I will see the hurt in everybody's eyes. I will see triumph in Tom's smile.  
  
Don't you think that day will be the best day of my life?  
  
-*-  
  
Did he ask if I would come along  
It all seemed so real  
But as I looked to the door   
I saw that boy standing there  
With a deal  
And he said take my  
Hand  
Live while you can  
Don't you see your dreams are  
Right in the palm of your hand  
  
-*-  
  
Harry Potter picked the parchment up from the bed. He bowed his head after reading the last words on it. Ginny's last words. He showed it to Hermione Granger quietly.  
  
She cried for her friend. And for everybody else lost. Ron was no longer with them. Draco had been killed by an Auror. Ginny was dead.  
  
Dead.   
  
She had been found in the middle of a flower field, surrounded by lilies. In her hands was a little black book that was instantly recognized as Tom Riddle's diary.   
  
Virginia Weasley was dead.   
  
Nobody understood who had arranged her body so neatly. Who had gone through a lot of trouble doing so. Nobody but the spirit present in Ginny's room.   
  
Tom Riddle smiled as Harry Potter put a comforting arm around his friend's shoulder. A little redhead appeared at his side, and embraced Tom lovingly.  
  
They were together again.  
  
-*-   
  
Right in the palm of your hand  
  
-*-  
  
Kath-  
  
Life for life  
Life for life  
Giving  
  
Heart for heart  
Heart for heart  
Sharing  
  
Love for love  
Love for love  
Having  
  
I love you girl, don't you dare to forget that!!!  
  
-LW. 


End file.
